IGIHE

Ba mwiza ubundi uceceke! Imyumvire ikwiriye guhinduka mu bagore n’abakobwa

0 26-06-2022 - saa 09:28, Léana Bisa

’Sois belle et tais-toi’, ni mvugo y’Igifaransa ishatse kuvuga ngo ba mwiza ubundi uceceke. Nzi neza ko abakobwa benshi baribwiwe igihe runaka mu buzima bwabo.

Nzi neza ko hari abagore cyangwa se abakobwa babwiwe ko ikintu cyonyine bakeneye kuba ari ukuba mwiza, bakazabasha gushaka umugabo akaba aribwo buzima bwiza.

Mu bihe bya kera abagore babwirwaga ko bafite inshingano ebyiri, iyo gushaka bakaba abagore no kubyara abana bakarera.

Mu gihe cy’iterambere ry’inganda ku isi byabaye ngombwa ko abagore batangira gukora kugira ngo babashe kugira ibibatunga, ya mvugo isa n’itangiye guta agaciro.

Icyo gihe cyerekanye ko abagore atari abatetsi gusa cyangwa abo kurera abana gusa ahubwo bashoboye byinshi kimwe nk’uko umugabo yabishobora.

Ibi nibyo byaciriye inzira ibyo tuzi uyu munsi nk’iterambere rirambye ry’umugore. Bishatse kuvuga ko ibihugu byahaye amahirwe abagore bose cyane cyane abakennye kubasha gukoresha amahirwe agiye atandukanye bafite kugira ngo bubake ubukungu babashe kwitunga no kwibeshaho.

Muri Afurika ho bisa nk’aho byari bikiri inyuma kuko bari abantu bafite imico yabo itandukanye muri buri gace, gusa icyagaragaraga naho ni uko umugore yari uwo mu rugoi.

Haje kuza rero ubukoloni, buzana iyobokamana, uburezi bw’Abanyaburayi, politike n’ibindi. Abahungu nibo byagezeho cyane ariko nyuma yo kubiharanira abakobwa benshi nabo bagiye batangira kujya mu ishuri bakiga.

Ibi byose nibyo byaganishije ku isi ya none ubwo abagore bateye imbere ndetse uburenganzira bwabo ahantu hamwe na hamwe bugaraharinwa. Ubu ushobora gusanga abagore mu bikorwa bitandukanye nk’uburezi, ubuvuzi, ubuhinzi, ubwubatsi, politike nibindi.

Nubwo bitaba byoroshye, abakobwa ndetse n’abagore umuntu yavuga ko bari kwiyubaka kandi ko ibyo bamaze kugeraho mu bukungu ndetse n’ibindi byinshi bamaze kumarira isi muri rusange.

Igikomeza kuntaganza rero kugeza uyu munsi, ni uko hakiri abantu bigisha abakobwa kuba bakiri bato, ko ikintu cya mbere umwana w’umukobwa agomba kwifuza no guharanira ari ukwicara akaba mwiza agashaka umugabo.

Mperutse kugirana ikiganiro n’umukobwa ukiri muto. Afite imyaka 24 y’amavuko kandi ari mu bucuruzi by’umwihariko mu ikoranabuhanga. Ni umuntu ubona ko ari gushakisha ubuzima no gutera imbere kuko afite intego n’icyerekezo.

Umukobwa ubona neza ko ari mu nzira yo kwiteza imbere mu buryo burambye. Muri icyo kiganiro twagiranye, yambwiye ukuntu abantu bamwe na bamwe mu muryango we icyo bamwifuzaho ari ugushaka umugabo gusa ko ibindi byose ntacyo bibabwiye.

Nubwo tuvuga ko turi mu isi yateye imbere aho imigenzereze imwe n’imwe yahindutse aho abagore bahawe rugari bagahabwa amahirwe, agaciro n’ibindi.

Haracyari imyumvire mu bantu bamwe na bamwe aho abagore bagisabwa kubahiriza kandi akenshi iyo myumvire baba barayishyizwemo n’abandi bagore nk’ababyeyi babo, ba Nyogokuru ndetse n’abandi.

Muri icyo kiganiro natekereje uburyo uwo mukobwa afite ubwenge ndetse n’intego nziza ariko icyo umuryango we wifuza gusa akaba ari ugushaka umugabo akabyara abana.

Muri icyo kiganiro nibutse undi mukobwa na we uri mu kigero cy’imyaka 20 wigeze kumbwira ati “Njye mbonye umugabo ishuri (kaminuza) narireka”, nahise mubaza niba ari mu ishuri kugira ngo ate umwanya gusa kugeza igihe bazamushakira.

Nibwo nahise mbona ko kuba afite iyi mitekereze atari amakosa ye, kuko nibyo yabwiwe kuva akiri muto, ko intengo ya mbere umukobwa akwiriye kugira ari kubona umugabo ubundi akabyara.

Nibyo n’abasore benshi bigishwa na ba nyina. Dukunze kumva ababyeyi babwira abahungu babo ’gushaka’ umugore ushobora guteka no kwita ku bana, ibindi ntacyo bivuze. Cyangwa ngo ‘uyu arashabutse cyane nt’yitonda’ ntiyavamo umugore mwiza.

Niyo mpamvu abagabo bamwe batekereza ko iyo ashatse umugore, umugore agomba kuva mu kazi ke cyangwa se ibyo yifuzaga kuzakora bikaba inzozi gusa.

Niho rero ya mvugo ngo ‘ba mwiza ubundi uceceke’ iza kuko abakobwa benshi bigishijwe ko icyo bagomba gukora gusa ari ukuba beza, bagashyingirwa bakanabyara, ko ibindi ntacyo bazabimarisha.

Kubera iyi mitekerereze, bamwe mu bakobwa bakiri bato bumva ko ubuzima bwabo buzatangirira bukarangirira ku mugabo, niyo mpamvu badakoresha amahirwe bahawe. Muri make nta kindi bifuza kuba cyo kuko amaherezo ari ugushaka. Iyi myumvire ikwiriye guhinduka mu bakobwa bamwe na bamwe.

Imyumvire y'abakobwa n'abagore y'uko dipolome yabo ari umugabo, bikwiriye guhinduka
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